so I have had this app for two days and i see a pattern. it'll go from having a great time and being ecstatic meeting new worthwhile people and having nice conversations about dreams goals aspirations, but then there is a certain breed of men who dive right into the penis jokes. now i realized that my naivety has been my folly in the sense that i set myself up for these damn jokes and poorly thought out innuendos. like it starts off like "hey," "how are you what are you up to." then it goes into, my dick is my favorite body part," "do you want some marshmellows in your hot chocolate." "do you want some yellow to mix with your black?" "how's that ass looking?" who said that that was okay? like when they talk to girls does that shit work beyond cyber space? its all like bleh bleh bleh let me show you my cock, I bet you've never had whit dick before.
I'm sitting here looking at my phone like "this is why most girls in my generation are lesbians, because y'all are fucking ridiculous." it's exhausting. it's like an endless fuckboy trail. I don't understand why white guys, and asian guys dive straight into "ay shawtee whats good want some of this dick" like have you heard black people talk to eachother like this. my ass is sitting over here like "um..i'm watching iron man and reading fucking game of thrones speaking in complete sentences and running a blog, what the fuck are you trying to pull?"
I'm dying over here. it's like i'm not waiting for some douche in shining condom to fuck the sadness out of me, I've moved passed that phase in newly singleness. I can fuck the sad out of my damn self. I like having conversations. that's the only thing I really miss. I miss being attracted to someones mind and voice. I want to have a crush again. I'm too young to feel this indifferent. I want my story to have a plot twist hat leads me to random romance because I'm the shit. i'm not searching for penis jokes and racial innuendos. I'm aware that I'm chocolatey and delicious. I don't need you to remind me.come up with something better than putting your milk in my coco puffs.
I'm too damn fabulous for that shit. I mean compare me to a fuckin sonnet or a summers day mother fucker compare to a sunset or a cool breeze on a hot night.it's all bullshit. I had someone tell me "i'd never tried black girls before." NIGGA THE FAAAAWK YOU MEAN am i supposed to be some sexy racial experiment. pussy is pussy no matter what color the bitch is there is either good pussy or bad pussy, sex has no race.
the game is weak. and the whiteness is appalling. look I've never been rude to any culture i know all cultures are beautiful and shit but sometimes white guys do extra shit. it's like dude black girls are just girls don't make it weird. if you're white act white, don't go from Justin Beiber to asap rock just because you're talking to a woman of color. unless like you grew up around black people and that shit is natural. but dude i fucking cant. so the moral of the story; be yourself, no dick unless i ask for it and no chocolate lines unless i fuck with you heavy.
THE END
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I feel like this is a serious opportunity to start fresh. Or I have just been watching the show hindsight to often. but it's a really great show. I am going to make the best out of the worst situation I have been in. But it kind of makes me happy that things have gotten so bad, I don't know how to explain it, I just feel like there is so much more hope for the future while you are at the bottom. like all I can see is the light at the end of the tunnel instead of focusing on being stuck in the damned tunnel. I feel like I work best when I am at this pint. my blog is blossoming, my writer's block cleared up all I do is write or blog and the feeling of productivity is the best feeling. its like there is this small sun in your brain that shines on what you really want and how you are going to get there.